Friday, July 28, 2006


I can't get on today and I'm starting to worry! I swear I'm a 14 year-old girl or somethin'.

Thursday, July 27, 2006

General Update

Jason bought his little jet ski. It's actually pretty nice and he got a decent deal. Honestly, I'm surprised he took the money out of the bank. He apparently had to take Chase to hold his hand for the withdrawal process. There is one thing about this man that I admire - his ass is TIGHT. He doesn't like to spend money and when he does he usually researches it so much he'll find something wrong with it and won't buy it. So, without further ado, here she is:

As for me, well since he was spending money I thought I was due to drop some ca$h too. On Friday I decided to take the kiddos to Disney World. We went down with my mom and aunt and hooked up with my other aunt. Kids had a great time. Abbe, of course, hated Mickey and all of the characters. Here are a few picture:

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Consultation had to be rescheduled!

I'm starting to think he's really getting cold feet. More info to come.....

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Abbe Mae

So apparently all the Catholics got an email about Little Miss Diva Girl's behavior at church on Sunday.........

Let me break it down. Jason wakes up and says he'd like to join us at church. I'm a bit shocked and confused as to why but am nonetheless excited he is actually showing interest in going. As we are getting ready to go his phone begins to ring off the hook and I suspect something is up. There is an alternative mottive to this situation. As we are getting the girls into their dresses he says, "Do you think it would be okay if I take Tyler out on the boat with Howard after church?" I was totally cool with that, hey, then I don't have to deal with you two this afternoon. He calls Howard back to tell him he'd meet up with him around noon. NOON? Hello? Mass starts at 11 am and by the time its over and we get donuts it's more like 12:30 - 12:40. I tell him this and he begs to be able to cut out early. Whatever.

So we get to church and I go to take Abbe Mae down to the daycare. Now she's been there before and I am hoping she remembers it but its been a while. The whole way down the hall she's telling me NO. I get in and put her down and she begins to scream. Seriously - SCREAM. High-pitch type of scream. The teacher gives me the pager and tells me if she doesn't cool down she'll call me in ten minutes. Ten minutes later I get the page and ask Jason to go get her. I can hear her screaming as he's carrying her up the stairs. He must of thought she would calm down because as he was waiting for her to do so, the whole entire church listened to her NO fit. Finally he realizes she has no intention of stopping and takes her outside, where she continues to scream. He gives up and decides to take her home (since we had driven two cars to church because remember he was going out on the boat for the afternoon). Apparently on the way home she's continuing to kick and scream and decides to get her daddy's attention by opening the car door while he's driving. Ever heard of child proof locks Jay??

I come home and she's snoozing but it was a very trying situation to say the least. She is such a DIVA. I have to get her adjusted to being left alone because I signed her up for PDO at our Church. She needs her time and I definitely NEED mine!

Anyhoo - Jason is out of town with his boss - kissing his butt as we speak. I'm at my parent's house and am going out to Joe's Crab Shack with the kids and neighbors. Kathy and Craig are a good set of people. Always have lots of fun with them. Ohhhh and the jet ski you ask? He'll probably get it. He's practically sold $1000 worth of stuff so it's pretty much a done deal. Hopefully it will be a quick purchase so he can start to use it and I won't have to listen to him cry about his balls anymore.

Monday, July 17, 2006

Saturday, July 15, 2006

Married with Children

So my husband wants a Jet Ski

He thinks it will help heal his balls. I'm so sick and tired of hearing about his balls its not even funny. He's trying to justify the jet ski by saying, "Its for the family" and "You'd look so good in a t-back on it" --- neither of which are remotely true. First I told him he could sell his boat and buy his jet ski - but then I felt guilty. He complained that he works so hard (which is very true) and he needs a little fun. While I can agree with that statement, this is the man that chewed me a new asshole last week for a couple of unathorized Target purchases (holla if ya hear me on that one ladies). So I worked out a new deal with him......come up with half of the money in cash and I'll agree to taking the remainder out of savings. Finally, something we can agree on. This man got up and particpated in a yard sale this morning and listed golf clubs, remote control cars, etc etc on Craigslist. As a matter of fact, he's outside in the garage making space for his new purchase and waiting for some redneck from Mt. Juliet to come and look at a $250 remote control car.......I wonder if he'll show up.

Anyhow - he's getting very creative with this whole thing. He even contacted his ex-wife (who's expecting) and asked if she's interested in purchasing baby clothes. This should be interesting!

Yard Sale Today

These yard sale people get up to early for me. We had people outside at 6:30 am. Anyway, selling a ton of clothes, all Tylers old clothers. We will rack up next year when we sell the baby girls clothes. I may do this proffesionally.

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Countdown Web Site

Vasectomy Consultation Countdown

Well I did it

I just called and got my referal to have my vasectomy. A appointment to stab my balls with two needles and rip my sack open to violate me.
I hope my wife is happy.

Thursday, July 6, 2006

Meat Man

You all remember the butcher, and how excited I was to find such a wonderful place to purchase my meat? Well apparently, all my so called friends are developing their own relationship with the butcher as well. Its like im sharing my wife, atleast I could kick her out, but how can I go without my butcher? His ribs are so delicious, his boston butts are so plump. I threaten to go to Publics and get my meat from a grocery store, but thats for losers. Its my own fault, i should have kept my meat man to my self and not said a word. Never again.

Had a great smoke out on the 4th. Did up 5 racks of ribs. I got off the plane from Chicago and dropped the family off at the house and went to the butcher and picked up my order. Drove home, trimmed them up and rubbed my secret spice into them. Foiled them, and let them sit over night in the fridge. This was a mobile smoke so I had to transport my smoking gear 40 miles south to the remote location. It was a great smoke, minimal charcoal used. Kept a great temp. Love the new kingsford charcoal (without lighter fluid). Everyone loved the ribs, got great reviews. Going to do a few key modifications sometime this week to the charcoal pan. Ill be sure to post some pictures, i know you cant wait.

Dont forget, the annual tomatoe fesitval is happening this weekend outside Memphis.